The Encyclopedia
A plain-language A-Z of fetishes and kinks. Each entry answers the same honest questions. What it is, whether it is common, why people have it, and how to explore it, all with no judgement and nothing explicit.
Materials & wear
A fabric, texture or garment.
Sensation & scene
A physical sensation or a set-up that creates one.
- orgasm denial Orgasm denial is the deliberate withholding of release, either self-imposed or handed to a partner who holds the decision. It covers edging, ruined orgasms and long-term denial, and the anticipation it builds is the point rather than a side effect.
- wax play Wax play is a form of sensation play where warm, melted candle wax is dripped onto the skin for the heat and the anticipation. Done with the right candles and a little care, it is a common, low-risk part of many people's kink.
Power & psychology
A dynamic of control, surrender or headspace.
- blackmail fantasy Blackmail fantasy is consensual play in which one person acts as though they hold something over another, and the threat of exposure is the charge. It becomes a different thing entirely once the material handed over is real and identifying, because nothing can be un-sent, and consent given in advance does not make later coercion consensual.
- brat and brat taming In the brat kink, a submissive playfully resists, teases and talks back instead of obeying, and the dominant partner enjoys taming them. The defiance is affectionate provocation, a game both people want, not real disrespect.
- financial domination Financial domination, or findom, is a kink in which the erotic charge comes from one person giving money or control over money to another. The turn-on is the transfer of power, not the purchase itself.
- financial submission Financial submission is the submissive side of financial domination: the person who gives money, or control over money, and takes the charge from the giving. The appeal is real, and so is the line where it stops being play and becomes exploitation.
- humiliation (erotic) A humiliation kink is arousal that comes from being embarrassed on purpose, such as being teased, gently put down, or exposed by a trusted partner inside a scene you both agreed to. The squirm is the point, and it stays healthy only with clear limits and aftercare.
- predicament bondage Predicament bondage is restraint arranged so that easing one discomfort creates another, leaving the bound person to choose between two unpleasant options. The choice is what makes it distinct: it hands the bottom real agency inside their own powerlessness.
Role & identity
Playing a part, or taking on another self.
- hypnokink (erotic hypnosis) Erotic hypnosis, also called hypnokink, is the use of hypnosis-style suggestion and trance for erotic play between consenting adults. It ranges from deep relaxation to elaborate mind-control fantasy, and it works with a willing subject rather than against them.
- maid fetish A maid fetish is an erotic interest in the maid figure and the service she represents, usually expressed through the classic uniform and the roleplay of waiting on someone. The appeal is the mix of costume, ritual and a gentle service dynamic.
- pet play Pet play is a roleplay where one person takes on the headspace and mannerisms of an animal, such as a puppy, kitten or pony, while a partner often plays the handler or owner. It is usually about play, affection and headspace rather than anything explicit.
- protocol and rituals BDSM protocol is an agreed set of behaviours that mark a dynamic: forms of address, positions, rules about speaking, and rituals that open and close a scene. Low protocol is a light touch of it; high protocol is a formal and detailed code.
Recognised yourself in one of these?
Knowing the name for it is step one. Step two is realising how many people are into the exact same thing, and open about it.
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